


The Feeling of Freedom

by ComeOnThrillMe



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Character Study, Coming Out, First Time, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:22:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24498637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ComeOnThrillMe/pseuds/ComeOnThrillMe
Summary: Excerpt: Draco Malfoy can recall the exact moments that changed the nature of his relationship with his father forever. The day he stopped trusting the man, the day he stopped fearing the man, and the day he knew he would despise this man forever.After the war, Draco returns to Hogwarts for his eighth year along with way too many Gryffindors - one being THE Harry Potter. How will the trauma of his past impact his attempts at 'normalcy'? Can he ever be 'normal'?
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Comments: 26
Kudos: 114





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I originally just posted the first chapter as a character study for Draco Malfoy, but decided to keep it going into an eighth year story! A few chapters have been written and I will be updating periodically. Kudos/comments welcome - enjoy!

Draco Malfoy had a strained relationship with his father, Lucius.

As a child, he loved his father dearly – even if he doesn’t remember ever being hugged or kissed or praised, he does hold _some_ fond memories. He remembers sitting in Malfoy Manor’s beautiful and grand library, with his father reading books to him about the rich history and lineage of the Malfoy name. Looking at his son and saying, “You are to carry on and uphold our name, son. You are my only heir; the duty lies with you.” And Draco remembers feeling proud about that – a sense of honor.

But Draco Malfoy can also recall the exact moments that changed the nature of his relationship with his father forever. The day he stopped trusting the man, the day he stopped fearing the man, and the day he knew he would despise this man forever. 

Draco’s fourth year at Hogwarts had been…eventful, to say the least. The TriWizard Tournament brought out a lot of emotions from the students at Hogwarts, and even if Draco hid his well – they still existed, somewhere under the surface.

Beyond just the tournament, the year was difficult for other reasons as well. As the year wore on, thoughts began to develop inside of Draco, and he began to have dreams late at night in the Slytherin dormitory. These dreams started innocent enough – a distorted face approaching him and smiling. The next night maybe the face would begin a conversation. The next night perhaps some…flirting.

The dreams escalated in this way until he was finally able to see features – dark hair, green eyes, a scar… Before Draco even knew the gender of this person, he knew the name – Draco Malfoy was having flirtatious dreams about golden-boy, Harry Potter.

He figured it was nothing. Likely just because of the fact that the prat was everywhere – defeating dragons, using advanced magic, rescuing people from the Black Lake…soaking up all the glory.

But as the year dragged on and Potter engaged in more and more _heroic_ tasks, Draco’s dreams increased.

But Draco was strong – he never allowed himself to act on these dreams. He would simply wake up, acknowledge the dream in his head, shake it off, take a cold shower, and go back to bed. By breakfast, the dream was lost somewhere in his bed sheets and would never see the light of day.

Without the ability to focus on schoolwork, friends, and insulting first years and muggle-borns, when he returned home after that year – the dreams increased. They not only increased in frequency but also in… _content_. Draco pushed and pushed at these dreams – plead for them to go away. Took shower after shower and erased them from his memory, but after his 15th birthday, Draco decided he could no longer refuse the dreams and decided to act on them.

He began to allow himself to indulge in some of the fantasies the dreams had created. And after a few nights of this, it soon became his favorite part of the day. He couldn’t figure out why he hadn’t done it sooner. After dinner, and once everyone in the house had gone to bed and his bedroom door was closed and locked tight, Draco would ceremoniously get into bed and allow his mind and hands to wander.

It was always the same person doing the same… _things_. And it was always perfect.

Draco continued in this way for a majority of June and throughout July. He stopped his mind from thinking too much about it or reading too much into what it could _mean_ and instead, just allowed himself to let it happen.

But things took a turn one night in early August. Draco was sitting at the dinner table with his parents and being served their dinner by the house elves. As he sat there, thoughts began to pop into his mind, and he began to feel familiar feelings running throughout his body. He continued to engage in normal, polite conversation with his mother and father – listening as they discussed day-to-day items from the Manor and their estate. But once dinner was over, Draco quickly excused himself from the table and made his way to his bedroom.

He quickly stripped off his clothes and jumped in between his silk sheets. He brought back all of the images his brain had created from the dinner table and began to roam his body.

If Draco hadn’t been so caught up in his thoughts, he probably would have heard a knock at the door. And if Draco hadn’t been in such a hurry to indulge himself, he would have probably remembered to lock the door…

Instead, Draco was stopped, abruptly, mid-way through his fantasies by a cold stare coming from his doorway. Draco quickly threw the covers over his body before feeling his entire body freeze. Lucius Malfoy said nothing but gave Draco a piercing stare before turning and leaving the doorway. As soon as he was gone, Draco felt a cold chill run over his body.

An hour later and Draco hadn’t moved. His room had grown darker and the only light available was traces of moonlight seeping through the curtains. He was soon startled by a house elf appearing in his room to inform him that his father wished to see him in the library for tea.

This couldn’t be good.

He dressed himself and went down the steps of Malfoy Manor. He noticed the house was silent – so his mother must already be asleep. As he entered the library, he saw two armchairs sitting across from one another and in front of a roaring fire. He stared at the seats before hearing his father’s voice, “Sit Draco. We are going to have a little talk.”

Draco couldn’t figure out the tone in his father’s voice, but something about the feeling of the room gave Draco a knot in his stomach. The room was heavy, and Draco could feel the magic creeping through the walls. He moved to sit in the chair opposite his father, but as he sat – he refused to meet his father’s eyes. He could feel them piercing into the top of his head.

“Take your tea Draco.” Draco looked to his right and saw a beautiful cup of tea sitting on a glass saucer floating in the air. He moved to take the tea and the saucer disappeared. “Drink Draco”. Draco moved to bring the cup to his mouth but caught a strange look from his father. He tried to take a sip of the tea and move it back to his lap but felt he couldn’t. The cup wouldn’t leave his lips. The tea burned his mouth as it went down, and he was forced to drink and drink until all the tea was gone.

Draco went numb. His body shivered, and in that moment, he knew that nothing good could from this conversation. Draco felt fear gripping him and plastering him to the chair.

Once the tea was gone, the cup disappeared and his father sat up straight in his chair, staring at his son. “You’re smart, so I trust by now you have an idea of the conversation we are about to engage in. We need to discuss the events of earlier tonight. I’ve had suspicions about your… _inclinations_ for a while now, and the serum will allow us to get the truth. Once we have the truth, we can fix it – the Malfoy name is too important for any _indiscretions_ to get in the way. Let’s start with easy questions to test the waters – Draco, when is your birthday and how old are you?”

Draco felt the words spill out of his mouth without warning, “My birthday is June 5th and I am 15 years old.”

“Good. Very good. Let’s make it a little harder – how long have you been doing that _disgusting_ thing I saw you doing in your room?” There was no missing the tone in his voice this time.

Draco tried to hold back, but once again felt the words coming, “Since the beginning of the summer.”

His father continued to stare. “I see. And what are you thinking about when you do… _that_?” Draco could hear the distain in his father’s voice and tried with every part of him to hold back.

“Dark hair…green…” The words came out choppier this time and his father could tell he was trying to resist the serum. 

His father’s voice became angrier, “No. Draco – what are you thinking about? Are you thinking about a boy?”

Draco froze and stared at his father wide-eyed. _Shit._ “Yes.” _Shit shit shit shit shit._ Draco couldn’t read the expression on his father’s face.

He began to panic. _Please don’t ask anymore, please let me go._ He pleaded in his head but knew it was useless.

“One more question Draco – _who_ are you thinking about? Is it one of your silly school friends? Vincent, Gregory, Blaise…? Which _boy_ is to blame for these perverse thoughts?” His father’s words stung.

Draco fought with every fiber of his being. He tried to hold his lips together until he felt blood forming inside his mouth. But the words came out anyway, “Harry Potter.”

Draco watched as his father’s face dropped. He must have not been expecting that. If he wasn’t so terrified, he might have rather enjoyed the look of pure shock on his father’s face.

But instead, all he felt was fear – he wanted to run out the library and go back to the safety of his room (or where there once was safety).

He thought his father would scream. Throw hexes at him, strike him down – he had done it enough times in the past, so Draco wouldn’t have been surprised. But instead – Draco was met with silence.

The two looked at each other for minutes before the Malfoy patriarch spoke, “Go back to your room Draco.” Draco didn’t need to be told twice – he tore out of that room and went straight up the stairs. But when he arrived at his room, he saw his door was missing.

He walked into the room and laid in his bed. As soon as he heard his father’s door close for the night, Draco began to cry.

He laid in bed that night in disbelief – his own father had used a truth serum on him. His father now knew Draco’s deepest, darkest secret. Not only did he like boys… he liked one boy in particular. Probably the one boy he shouldn’t like more than all the others.

So there it was – the day Draco Malfoy lost trust in his father.

The rest of that summer was tense. Draco and his father had several long, drawn-out discussions about his late-night activities. But strangely, the name Harry Potter wasn’t brought up once.

Instead, his father chose to focus on the fact that Draco was fantasizing about boys.

“I knew from a young age, Draco, that you were…inclined in that nature. I could tell.” One week after the ‘discussion’ in the library, his father sat Draco down again to once again ‘discuss’ the issue.

“But you are a Malfoy man. A pureblood. You belong to one of the wealthiest and well-respected houses in the pureblood families. Your activities must stop. You are not to act on these… _thoughts_ anymore. When you return to school, you are to begin thinking about your future. You will need a wife – your mother and I will arrange that. You are to produce an heir. Go back to school. Focus on your studies. And prepare for the life you were born to lead.”

The rest of the conversations leading up to his return to school continued in much the same way. A reminder of how _disgusting_ the thoughts were, an emphasis on the family name, and a clear expectation for the future he was to have. But never the name ‘Harry Potter’.

Draco returned to Hogwarts for his fifth year and intended to do as he was told. He would keep his head down, focus on his schoolwork, and his…future. The fact that he needed a wife and an heir never escaped his mind. He had known it his whole life. But strangely, while he was engaging in his _activities_ over the summer, the thought still didn’t leave his mind. Even while he was having his thoughts about Harry Potter, he never once thought it would or could lead to anything. He knew what he had to do, and he planned to do it.

During his time at the Manor for winter holiday during his fifth year, Draco began to hear whispers of the Dark Lord’s return. His father began to assemble Death Eaters at his house for meetings. His father usually made Draco and his mother leave for these occasions or be tucked away, safely, in their rooms.

Draco never understood this. If his father wished for him to be strong and ‘carry on the family name with honor’, then why not let him partake in these meetings? Why not let him become a Death Eater?

Draco received the answer to this question exactly one day after Christmas. A meeting was occurring in the dining hall of the Manor and Draco was tired of being holed up in his bedroom. He still didn’t have a door on the room and was growing weary of his lack of privacy – he began to wish he was back at school.

Late in the evening, he decided to make his way to the library for a change of scenery. He moved down the staircase and began to head towards the library door before he was stopped by whispers coming from the dining area. He knew a meeting was taking place, so he decided to quietly listen-on on what was so important that his father felt it best he wasn’t involved.

 _“It’s the boy, Lucius. He’s more of a threat than we thought. He will need to be stopped.”_ Draco’s spine chilled as he heard the voice of a man who had always made him uncomfortable, Yaxley.

 _“Then that’s what we will do. We will kill Harry Potter.”_ Draco’s heart stopped as he heard his father utter the words. He realized _this_ is why his father kept him away – Harry.

Draco moved to the library, closed the door, and sat in one of his favorite armchairs. He stared into the fire and was soon lost in thought. _I think the guy is attractive…that doesn’t mean I should be upset if he…dies. He’s just someone to think about…he doesn’t actually mean anything to me._

Just to be sure – he made sure to stay away from Potter in the second term of fifth year. He would still harass Granger and Weasley, but he needed to keep his distance from Potter.

The summer going into his sixth year is when Draco’s life took a turn for the worse.

Voldemort and several other Death Eaters moved-in to the Manor in mid-June. Draco’s father never once spoke to his son or wife about the new addition to their home – when the dark wizard arrived, it was as if it was simply expected. No conversation to be had.

Draco can remember the exact moment Voldemort entered his home. Draco was in his room when he heard whispers coming from downstairs. He moved to stand at the top of the staircase to have a better view of the entry way to the Manor. That’s when he saw…it.

He had never actually laid eyes on Voldemort before. He didn’t know what he was expecting, but the creature that entered his house certainly wasn’t it. Draco felt the house grow cold as a snake appeared and began to slither around the floor of the living area. Draco felt like he was going to be sick.

After the Dark Lord arrived, things only got worse. More and more meetings began to take place and eventually, Draco was called in. Draco knew he should be honored to finally have a seat at the table, but when he entered the dining hall – all sense of honor was gone. He was terrified.

Draco took a seat near his father at the very long table that sat in their formal dining room. Voldemort discussed a plan that only Draco could execute. He was to figure out a way to get Death Eaters into Hogwarts. Then, he was to kill Albus Dumbledore.

Draco watched as the Dark Lord spoke to him, but he couldn’t feel his body. His hands had gone numb and his brain went blank. He tried to listen as instructions were given but had tuned out a majority of the information. He didn’t snap back until he heard Voldemort say, “take the dark mark”.

Draco quickly looked at his father. He needed his father to stop this. He couldn’t do this. Bring Death Eaters into Hogwarts? How?!

Kill Albus Dumbledore? This is the most powerful wizard in the world…how was he, a sixteen-year-old boy, going to kill this man?

And…take the dark mark? Become one of… _them?_ A year ago, he would have jumped at the opportunity. Took it as a badge of honor and felt special to be included. But as he sat at the table, something didn’t feel right. If he did this, if he took the mark, then that would be it. His fate would be sealed. He would forever be associated with these people who had infiltrated his home. The people who made Draco’s blood curl and his entire being uncomfortable.

But as he looked to his father, he saw it. For the first time all summer, he _really_ looked at his father. The once powerful man looked…broken. He was paler and had lost a lot of his body weight. The man sitting near him at this table, in _their_ home was weak.

His father didn’t make eye contact with him, simply said, “It’s an honor Draco.” All while continuing to stare at the table.

Draco looked back at Voldemort and felt a familiar chill run down his spine. This was what true fear feels like.

And so, this was it – the day Draco Malfoy stopped fearing his father. There were much scarier things in the world than Lucius Malfoy.

The events of the war will forever live in Draco’s memories. He will never forget the feeling of being face-to-face with his old headmaster, ready to kill him (although he knew he never would). He will never erase the visions of the Carrows torturing first years as Draco stood idly by and did nothing.

Some memories hurt more than others. The memory of seeing a disfigured Harry Potter dragged into his home and held up for him to expose (which he knew he couldn’t do). Or the screams of Hermione Granger being sliced open by his aunt. The look on Luna Lovegood’s face as Draco brought food down to her and the others in the cellar of his childhood home.

Other memories were almost too much to handle. The feeling of fiendfyre surrounding and suffocating him before a strong hand reached out to grab him. The feeling of pressing up against the back of his savior and the loss of the pressure as he tumbled down to the ground outside the Room of Requirement. Or watching a lifeless Harry Potter being carried toward the castle by Hagrid and feeling as though everything was over…and everything was ruined. The feeling of winning the war, but actually losing.

He re-plays the scene of Harry Potter rolling out of Hagrid’s arms and jumping to defeat Voldemort. It’s his favorite memory from the war. It’s the moment he felt hopeful for the first time in a long time and as he watched the Dark Lord die (for good) he felt relief wash over his body.

But nothing would match the memory of his own father after the war.

When all of the Death Eaters were rounded-up after the war and brought to Azkaban to await trial, Draco didn’t fight it. He deserved punishment. He deserved the Dementor’s Kiss.

His mother’s trial was first, and Draco hoped she would be let off easily. She didn’t do anything wrong in the war. Her only fault was marrying a man as cowardly as his father.

Draco wasn’t allowed at her trial but had heard that she had been let off with no consequences. He didn’t know how, and he frankly didn’t care, she was free; that’s all that mattered.

When it came time for his own trial, he expected it would be quick. There was plenty of evidence to suggest he attempted to kill Dumbledore, he let Death Eaters into Hogwarts, and he was in the room that caught fire and nearly killed The Savior. But to his surprise, when he went before the Wizengamont, he saw the face of that very same…savior. His savior.

Harry Potter spoke for him. He talked about how they were both just children when the war started and how the consequences of a parent shouldn’t trickle down to their child. He spoke of Vincent Crabbe conjuring the fiendfyre, not Draco. And he spoke on how Draco couldn’t kill Dumbledore – apparently Harry was there that night in the astronomy tower and witnessed the entire scene.

The Chosen One’s words must hold power because Draco was let out with stipulations. He wasn’t allowed to leave his house for the remainder of the summer and was due to repeat his final year at Hogwarts before being allowed to enter the work force or pursue a higher degree.

Draco was speechless. And grateful.

Draco watched Harry closely during the trial. The boy…now man, had changed. He looked refreshed, but haunted. He wore a hardened expression that Draco recognized because it was one, he too wore – an expression of pain stuffed behind a mask of confidence.

The day before his father’s trial, Draco decided to pay a visit to Azkaban. He didn’t know why, but something compelled him to go – it was still his father.

As soon as he made his way to his father’s cell, he was met with a familiar face. The face of a broken, tired, and defeated man. His father had fallen far from the glory of Draco’s younger years and now sat alone and miserable, rotting in a jail cell.

And Draco quickly realized he felt…nothing.

As soon as his father saw him, he came rushing towards the bars, “Draco! My boy! You have to help me. You have to speak to him – get him to let me out of here!” His words were rushed, and his voice sounded erratic.

Draco threw his father a confused look. “Get _who_ to help you exactly?”

“Harry…Harry Potter. I know he helped you and your mother. He can help me too. Talk to him Draco!” Draco stood incredulous.

“I-I can’t just talk to Harry Potter. He’s not going to help you. He hates you. I don’t know why he spoke for mum or me, but I can assure you he won’t do the same for you. Even if I did ask.” Draco watched his father’s face change.

“Remember Draco – I know. I know things about you and _him._ I could go before the Wizengamont and expose the truth. Tell him that. You tell him that if he doesn’t help your father, then I will tell the whole world the truth about their Savior.” That’s when it dawned on Draco. His father thought he had been thinking about Harry Potter because they were…together.

Draco looked his father in the eyes. “Harry Potter and I are nothing. We never were. He hates me and he always has. Like I said, I don’t know why he spoke for me, but I can assure you – it has nothing to do with the… _things_ you know about me. I will not be speaking to him for you. You will be convicted. Because you are guilty. And you will stay here and rot away until you die the death you deserve.”

And on that note, Draco began to walk away. It was in this moment that he realized he despised his father, and always would. But it was also in this moment that he realized – he was free.


	2. A Death Eater and the Golden Trio

Draco was right about his father’s trial. Harry was not as generous as he had been for Draco or Narcissa. As a matter of fact, Harry Potter refused to speak on behalf of Lucius Malfoy altogether and instead gave over his memories of the man from the past seven years. More than enough to convict.

Lucius Malfoy would spend the rest of his days in Azkaban Prison and Draco vowed to never visit his father again.

Draco wanted to be thankful for his light sentence, but every minute he stayed in the Manor was pure torture. Upon his return, his mother placed his door back on his room, but didn’t speak about the circumstances involving its disappearance. In fact, she hardly spoke at all.

Draco figured his mother must be grieving the loss of his father and decided to let her be. But this meant more time _alone_ in this…house. This house that once held fond memories of meals and holidays and gifts, but now represented terror and torture and trauma.

As much as he was somewhat dreading returning to Hogwarts with the rest of the students from his year, it was a step-up from his current situation. So, when he received his letter from McGonagall, he was more than happy to read it and accept.

Draco figured the letter was standard for all returning eighth year students – talks of the ‘impact of the war on your education’, ‘education is important’, and this is ‘optional’. Draco couldn’t help but scoff at the word – ‘optional’ for all but him.

But an addendum to the letter came exactly two weeks later that was specific to only Draco. It discussed the new rooming situation for eighth years – a separate dormitory, away from the other houses. It included the rationale that they were now too old to live with younger students and it was proper that they were given autonomy with their age. The separate dorm would have fewer students and all of the Slytherins in his year had expressed they would not be returning. The dorms would be two students to a room, but Draco would be given his own room.

Draco was quick to notice the inclusion of ‘for your own safety’ when discussing rooming, but Draco felt he knew what she truly meant was ‘for the safety of others’. But he didn’t mind. Draco planned to keep his head down this year, finish his studies, graduate, and hopefully secure a job out of the public’s view. So – it’s probably best he be given his own room.

When Draco walked into Hogwarts on the night before his first day of classes, he wasn’t met with the shocked faces he had expected. It seemed everyone knew he would be returning. He was, however, still met with whispers and stares as he made his way into the Great Hall for the sorting ceremony. He listened as Headmistress McGonagall gave a heart-warming speech about the ‘trials and tribulations you have all experienced as a result of the war’ and how ‘we will be striving to mend the broken relationships and prejudices that have developed as a result of this war’ and on this she made a quick look towards the near-empty Slytherin table.

Draco ate his dinner that night, alone. He sat at the very end of the table and made a conscious effort to not look at anyone or anywhere – just down at his plate. But as hard as he tried, his eyes still managed to find Potter. Staring at Potter had become a hobby over the past 7 years, he wasn’t sure who he thought he was kidding thinking it would stop now.

As he looked at the Savior, he couldn’t help but feel jealously creep upon him. The boy… _man_ looked radiant. The months since the trial didn’t seem to have an effect on him. His hair was still a mess, but Draco could tell the boy was eating and sleeping well (very much unlike Draco). He also still had his friends. Granger and Weasley sat next to him, listened as he spoke, and all laughed together at the same things. Draco was also quick to notice the girl Weasley sitting right next to Harry – hanging on every word the man said. She stared at him the way Draco tried not to stare at him. The way he had been trying not to stare since he was 14 years old.

They all looked so happy. And Draco honestly felt they deserved it.

The first night back was slightly awkward, but Draco quickly realized that the rest of the eighth years felt as he did – let’s just get through this. They all retired to their dorm that night and took a quick tour before finding their rooms. No one questioned when Draco had his own room, the same way Draco didn’t question Harry and Ron rooming together. It was just how it was supposed to be.

Draco learned a lot in his first week of classes. He learned people still hated him – it didn’t matter what the Chosen One said at his trial – Draco Malfoy was a Death Eater. And to some people, that’s all that mattered. But he learned that if he didn’t _look_ at anyone, then they wouldn’t outright say anything to him. Maybe mutter something under their breathes, but nothing direct.

He learned that the professors were _trying_ to be fair with him. Some of them, like Slughorn, didn’t actually want to speak to him – but they weren’t rude or unfair. They almost acted like he didn’t exist. Which he was fine with. So long as they gave him fair marks, he wouldn’t mind.

He learned that Slytherin house was small. Very small. Several people didn’t return (even in the younger years) and very few first years were sorted into the house at all. Draco assumed this had to do with their involvement during the war and the new-found prejudice towards the house, but once again, Draco didn’t mind. It meant fewer people were trying to talk to him during meals. And by fewer, he meant none.

He also learned of many relationship revelations that had occurred since the war. Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley had re-kindled their romance (not that Draco cared or anything). Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley were now together (which made Draco confused because he assumed they always had been). Luna Lovegood was now dating Neville Longbottom (Draco didn’t care for Neville very much but had grown fond of Luna during her time at the Manor and was glad she was happy). Padma Patil was now dating Terry Boot (Draco didn’t even know if he could pick out who Terry Boot was so he couldn’t care less). The most interesting pairing to Draco was actually Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan. It seems the two had been together ever since Dean and Ginny broke up and had made it public over the summer.

No one seemed to mind. On the contrary, people seemed…happy for them. Seeing them together caused something to pull at Draco. By this point, he knew he was gay. But years of dealing with his father’s ‘views’ on the matter, had left a scar.

With his father in prison, the Malfoy name was already disgraced. It wasn’t like Draco could do anything more to tarnish it. They barely managed to keep their house and _some_ of their money. There wasn’t much left to ruin. This meant it didn’t matter what Draco did with his life. It didn’t matter if he found a wife, produced an heir, none of it mattered… so maybe that meant he didn’t have to. Maybe that meant he too could have a relationship like Dean and Seamus…obviously not anytime soon – he didn’t know anyone else at Hogwarts who was gay and even if he did, he doubted anyone would date _him._ But maybe in a few years…once things calmed down. If they ever calmed down…

Draco kept all of this to himself. Two weeks into term and he had yet to speak to another student.

He simply went from his room, to his bathroom, to the Great Hall, to class, to the library, and back to his room. In the library, he found a table at the very back that didn’t require him to look at anyone. It was just him and his books. He spoke to no one and no one spoke to him.

That was until Hermione Granger found him.

On the Monday of his third week into term, a mound of brown hair pulled out a chair at his table at the back of the library and sat down. She opened up her books and began to study.

Draco looked up in complete confusion, “Lost Granger?” Draco’s eyebrows shot up as he spoke, and he pushed for his voice to _not_ sound like a dick. He was really working on that, but years of harassing his peers had caused a semi-permanent dick-ish tone to come out of his mouth whenever he spoke.

“No. I’ve seen you sitting here for the past couple of weeks. It’s smart. Out of the way of people staring and silent. Thought I would join you.” There was no request in her voice.

Draco didn’t respond. He simply went back to his books.

“Why do you sit back here anyway?” Draco was surprised at the continuation of the conversation.

“I think you already answered that question. No stares. Silent.” Still trying to keep from sounding like a dick.

“Right… makes sense. I’ve seen quite a bit of staring aimed at you since we’ve been back. And some…whispering. But I haven’t seen you interact with anyone.” Hermione gave him a pitiful look.

Draco simply looked at her. As she continued to stare at him, he couldn’t help himself, “Was there a question in their Granger? Was I supposed to say something?”

“Oh. Right. Um, I just mean, why haven’t you talked to anyone?” Draco could tell she was getting uncomfortable and likely regretting her choice in seats today.

“There’s no one for me to speak with. My friends are…gone.” Draco watched as Hermione beat herself up in her head for not thinking about that.

That was the end of their conversation. But it certainly wasn’t the end of Hermione. She continued to sit there for the rest of the day and came back every day that week. She never spoke. Just pulled out a chair, sat down, and took out her books.

Draco figured Hermione would say something eventually. They weren’t friends, far from it actually, but he knew this girl pretty well. She was intelligent and determined. If she wanted something, she would work to get it. And she’d be clever about it.

That’s how Draco ends up engaged in conversation with her on their fourth day together.

“Draco”. Draco looked up from his books, in shock by the use of his first name.

“Yes…Hermione.” He figured he should extend the same courtesy.

“I’ve been thinking…” This couldn’t be good…

“Well, you are quite good at that. Do go on.” Draco gave a half smile that was returned.

“Why don’t you sit with us at dinner tonight?” Draco wasn’t expecting that. He sat silent.

Hermione continued, “I just think that…I think it would be a good show of unity. You know? Like, we’re putting things in the past. Moving forward.” There was the determination he knew.

“Oh, you mean the Death Eater and the Golden Trio – sharing a meal.” Draco heard the sarcasm in his voice and hated himself for it. He really didn’t mean to be rude. It just…happened sometimes.

“Well, I wouldn’t use those terms, but yes. More or less. But you don’t have to. You can continue to sit alone and talk to…no one.” Her tone sounded dismissive, but he knew her. She was using a tactic to get him to go.

“Okay.” Because why not? He knew Ron Weasley wouldn’t hex him in the presence of his girlfriend and Harry would…well, Draco didn’t really know how Harry would handle it, but he imagined it would be safe, nonetheless.

And that’s how Draco ended up sitting at the Gryffindor table Friday night.

Hermione must have not told them he was coming, which was smart on her part. Didn’t give them a chance to mysteriously eat in the kitchens or go to Hogsmeade instead. But it also meant they weren’t prepared and therefore couldn’t hide the emotions from their face.

“Draco is eating with us today. Sit here Draco.” Draco did as he was told. He loved how direct she was.

As Draco sat down, he noticed a disgruntled expression rising on Ron’s face. He looked to find a heated glare coming from the younger Weasley but was surprised to find a Harry that was…smiling.

Ron attempted to adjust quickly and by ‘adjust’ it meant ignore Draco completely. He began to discuss topics with the members of his table, all the while pretending Draco wasn’t sitting next to his girlfriend. He looked at everyone else, but Draco.

Draco really didn’t mind. This was much better than the alternative – Ron losing his shit and throwing curses. Or Ginny transfiguring his food into rodents or something.

Draco wasn’t prepared when Harry of all people began to include him. “How are classes going for you Draco?”

Draco looked up and he met the eyes of the man in front of him. He hadn’t noticed how much he had been avoiding those eyes all meal. “Fine.”

“Just fine? I could have sworn Slughorn was going to have a fit when he had to give you a perfect score on your Draught of Peace potion yesterday.” Harry chuckled.

Draco couldn’t help but smile. “Bit ironic when you think about it.”

“Blimey, the head of your own house doesn’t even like you.” Ron’s eyes went wide as he spoke. Almost as if he didn’t mean for it to actually come out.

“Ron!” Hermione kicked her boyfriend under the table.

“No, it’s alright Hermione. He’s right. Slughorn doesn’t like me. He never has actually, and I didn’t really expect that to change this year.” The table went quiet.

“Of all people, he is no one to judge anyone for their actions during the war. Bloody coward ran, didn’t he?” Shit, Harry was defending him…

No one argued with him. The table was quiet before Ginny moved the topic to quidditch and what a shame it was that Harry wouldn’t be allowed to play. She put her arm on his shoulder and kissed his cheek.

Draco flushed and looked away. But before he did, he could have sworn he saw a look pass over Harry’s face. He wasn’t sure what the look meant, but it didn’t mirror Ginny’s. 

The rest of dinner went by without ceremony, as did their retreat to the eighth-year dorms. The only item of note was when Ginny asked Harry to walk her to her dorm and he turned her down with a ‘I’m quite tired actually, I really should get to bed’. Draco wanted to make a comment about it only being 8 but thought it best to keep to himself.

The next morning, Draco began his Saturday routine. He loved the weekends at Hogwarts. Especially now with his own room and people leaving him alone. He would wake up slowly. Allow his hand to drift down into his pants before getting up to take a long, luxurious shower. Then, he would dress slowly before going down for breakfast. He would spend the rest of the day in the library or walking around the grounds. Compared to the year he had just experienced, it was peaceful.

This is why Draco was disgruntled when his routine was interrupted by a knock on his door at 8am. He pulled his hand from his pants, grabbed his robe, and moved towards his door hoping the robe was enough to hide the proof of his early-morning activities.

He wasn’t prepared to open the door and find the star of his very recent fantasy standing in his doorway, wearing no shirt and looking very disoriented.

“Potter…can I help you?” Draco kept his eyes glued to the top of the man’s head – refusing to allow himself to look further.

The other man apparently didn’t feel the same way. Draco watched as Harry’s eyes looked him over rather slowly before his mouth began to speak, “Um, I was instructed to invite you to breakfast.” He said as he let out a yawn.

“I see…” Draco definitely wasn’t expecting this.

“Yeah, so, change out of your sleep robes…I guess. And come meet us.” Harry motioned towards his outfit as he spoke.

“These aren’t sleep robes Potter, it’s just a robe. And it’s actually quite expensive, I’ll have you know.” Draco hated himself.

“Of that I am sure.” Harry remarked before letting out a laugh. “We’ll meet you in the common room in 20”.

Draco nodded and closed the door. Twenty minutes. That wasn’t nearly enough time to complete his morning routine. He had to make a choice – get back in bed and finish what he started…or shower.

After the sight he just saw, Draco decided bed was the better choice. He’d shower this evening.


	3. A Change in Status

Draco ate breakfast with the Trio (plus Ginny) and actually didn’t hate it. He hadn’t realized how much he was _missing_ interaction. He didn’t understand some of their inside jokes and he was growing nauseated watching Ginny fawn over Harry, but all in all, he was enjoying himself.

He continued to eat with them throughout the weekend. By lunch on Sunday it had become expected. No one batted an eye when he sat down, and they were starting to warm to the idea of him being there.

But when Draco arrived in the Great Hall for dinner on Sunday, he was met with a much smaller group – Hermione and Ron. He assumed, and hoped, Harry and the girl Weasley were just running late and took his seat anyway. He didn’t want to imagine the reasons _why_ they might be late.

“Where’s Harry?” Draco had to catch himself, “and Ginny?” there you go Draco.

He watched as Ron met Hermione’s eyes. “Harry wasn’t in the room when I left – Where’s Ginny ‘Mione?” Draco secretly loved when they called her that. It was amusing for such a strong person to have such a sweet nickname.

But Hermione didn’t answer. Draco began to fill his plate and just stared back and forth between the couple.

“Oh blimey! They’re not…ugh!” Ron seem disgruntled by Hermione’s lack of a response.

“No Ronald! I don’t think that’s what they’re doing actually….” Hermione looked down at her plate as her voice got soft.

Draco remained silent. He didn’t exactly know what was going on, but already felt uncomfortable being with just the two of them – he didn’t need to put his foot in his mouth to make things worse.

“…Hermione? What do you know?” Ron gave his girlfriend a look that screamed ‘I know you know, so just tell us’.

Hermione took a deep breath, “Well, it’s not really my business to tell. I just saw Ginny crying earlier. Her and Harry had been talking in the Gryffindor common room. But I don’t know anything else.”

Almost on cue, Harry walked in the Great Hall wearing a disheveled look. He looked as if he had just put up about a hundred protection spells and was exhausted.

No one spoke as Harry sat down. They all sat in silence and watched as he piled his plate with all of his favorites – which Draco sadly knew well. Once his plate was full, he must have felt the tension and looked up to find six eyes staring at him.

“Alright?” was all he said before shoveling food into his mouth. Draco always hated his lack of table manners. He watched as over the years they had gotten slightly better, but it always looked as if Harry hadn’t eaten in fifteen years and he ate as if the food would be taken at any moment.

“Harry…are you okay?” Hermione wore her ‘comforting friend’ voice well.

“I’m fine Hermione. You can all stop looking at me like that.” And that ended that conversation.

They sat in an odd silence until luckily, Dean and Seamus came to cut the tension. Draco noticed as the two boys approached the table hand-in-hand and felt a strange feeling enter his stomach…envy?

“Alright Draco?” The boys hesitated before sitting. They just stood in front of Draco, hands still clasped against one another.

“Alright Seamus.” Draco was confused. This was an odd position to be in.

“Just wondering why every time I come to sit at Gryffindor table lately, I see _you_ here.” Draco could hear the disapproving tone in Seamus’ voice. Dean just stood there looking rather uncomfortable and moving his eyes around the Great Hall.

Draco tried very hard to not bite back but had had so little interaction with others that he just couldn’t help himself. “And I wonder how on earth you two managed to convince McGonagall to room you together.” Draco hoped it sounded cheeky and not mean – but he never really did learn the difference.

The table paused for a moment before Seamus let out a roaring laugh and Dean chuckled. The two sat down as Seamus started talking, “Because we’re best _mates_ don’t you know?” and shot Draco a wink.

Seamus leaned over to kiss Dean – the kiss wasn’t obscene, but Draco definitely felt that if McGonagall saw, she wouldn’t think they were just _mates,_ any longer. Draco noticed Harry quickly look away from the kiss.

When the two broke apart, Seamus looked at Draco again, “Not making you uncomfortable eh, Malfoy?”

“Not at all, Seamus. But poor Harry looks like he’s about to faint.” All eyes turned to Harry.

“No I’m not! I already told you both I was fine with it! Happy for you even! Smitten!” Harry’s voice had gotten higher and Draco felt this was strange. Why was Harry trying so hard to convince everyone he was okay with the relationship when it obviously made him uncomfortable? Was Savior Potter secretly homophobic?

Dean smiled, “We know Harry. I think Malfoy is just messing with you.” Harry turned to look at Draco who smiled. Luckily, Harry smiled back, and Draco could exhale.

Draco thought he might have overstepped with his jab at Harry during dinner. But as they were finishing up, Harry looked at Draco and said, “Want to grab our brooms and go out to the quidditch pitch?”

Draco was startled by the offer. “Um…I don’t – I don’t have a broom with me.”

“No bother – there are loads in the quidditch storage room. We’ll just grab one from there. Come on!” Harry stood to leave, and Draco began to follow suit.

“I’ll grab my broom too!” Ron offered up quickly.

“Actually Ron, I was going to play Draco in a seeker-on-seeker game. Just the two of us.” Draco stood in silence as he watched Ron’s face fall as he sat back at the table.

Draco noticed the members of the table exchange looks, but he dismissed them and quickly turned to follow Harry.

They went to get Harry’s broom then began their walk towards the pitch. Harry grabbed Draco a broom and mounted his own. As Harry kicked off into the air, and Draco followed after – he tried not to watch the way Harry’s body moved on the broom. He had played against Harry enough times to know that when Harry flew it was like watching a hippogriff take flight. He was always majestic but matched with intensity. Harry didn’t fly because he had to, he flew because it made him feel good.

Draco soon realized that Harry hadn’t actually brought a snitch for them to play with and quickly pieced together that Harry only wanted it to be the two of them. Draco felt his chest warm.

The two flew around for an hour before Draco saw Harry begin to aim back towards the ground. When the two touched down Harry let out a loud yell that startled Draco.

When Draco looked at Harry’s face, he saw a huge grin that Draco couldn’t help but notice lit up Harry’s green eyes.

“I love flying. Doesn’t it feel so good to just…let go?” Harry turned to look at Draco, but Draco made a failed attempt to look away quickly before Harry noticed he had been staring.

“Uh, yeah. Feels great.” Draco looked around the pitch.

“Ginny and I broke up.” Draco looked up quickly and met Harry’s eyes.

“Oh…” Draco didn’t know what to say. Or if he was supposed to say anything.

“That’s why I was late to dinner.” Harry said it so matter of fact. It was off-putting.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Didn’t want to deal with the questions. Or Hermione giving me that _look_ or Ron trying to hex me or something.” Draco thought the last one was probably a joke but chose not to laugh just in case.

“Then…why are you telling me?”

“Dunno. Figured you wouldn’t tell anyone. Seeing as how you don’t actually talk to anyone.” _Ouch._

“Right…”

“Shit, I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant…like, you won’t go around spreading it. You seem to be keeping to yourself this year. I haven’t heard you say anything bad about anyone – no slurs or insults.”

“Well, you aren’t around all the time, Potter.” Draco shot Harry a smile.

“I’m around enough. We share a dormitory, several classes, and now the same table for meals. I notice things.” He had a point. They did seem to be around each other a lot lately. And Potter had noticed…

“All true, Potter.” The two turned to start to put Draco’s broom back and head towards the castle.

“I’m sorry Pansy didn’t come back…” Draco was startled at the mention of his friend’s name.

“Why on Earth would _you_ be sorry she didn’t come back? She tried to offer you up to Voldemort like a piece of centaur meat.”

“True, but she’s your girlfriend, right? I imagine you must be pretty lonely here without her or your other friends.” Harry looked down at the ground.

 _Pansy? His girlfriend?_ “She wasn’t my girlfriend Potter. As much as my dear father would have loved it, Pansy and I were never together.”

“Oh…I- I just assumed. Sorry…” Harry kept his eyes on the ground and let his voice get quiet. “I’m a little relieved. I’m surrounded by couples all the time… and now that Ginny and I are…it’ll be nice to have someone else who’s single.”

“Who says I’m single Potter?”

“But – you just, you just said you weren’t with Pansy.”

“True. But haven’t you seen the flock of students lining up to date me? I’m very sought after you know.” Draco kept a serious face for as long as possible before cracking into a smile.

Harry started laughing and Draco felt something pull at his heart. He always liked the way Harry laughed with his whole body. His broad shoulders moving just slightly.

_Stop thinking about Harry Potter’s shoulders while you’re standing this close to him._

The two made their way to the common room and into their respective dorms. Draco crawled into bed and reflected on the very strange turn of events that happened in just one weekend. He now had people to sit with for meals and Harry Potter was now…single.

Draco hadn’t told anyone, because honestly – who was he going to tell, but word seemed to travel fast anyway. Once word got out about the Chosen One’s new relationship status, Draco actually began to fear for Harry’s life.

The entire week after their flying session, Harry refused to leave his room except for classes. Whenever he did leave his room, he was met with swarms of girls trying to make their way to him. Various boxes were left outside the eighth-year dorm with Harry’s name on it (some of which emitted odd odors that Draco took care to get rid of immediately).

During dinner on Wednesday, Draco was met with a rather disgruntled Hermione Granger approaching him. “He wants you to bring him food.”

Draco finished chewing the chicken he had just placed in his mouth before answering, “What?”

“You. He wants YOU to bring him food.” Draco pieced together that she meant Harry.

“Oh…right, yeah okay.” Draco stood and began to make Harry a plate. As he placed more and more food on the plate, he noticed Hermione and Ron sharing a look. Before he turned to leave, he thought of one more thing, “Ron, if they have treacle tart – will you grab some and bring it to Harry later?”

Ron blinked and raised his eyebrows before answering, “Uh…yeah. Sure.” Then looked back at Hermione.

As Draco made his way to the eighth-year dorm and towards Harry’s room he couldn’t help but notice the increase in stares he was receiving since sitting with the Golden Trio for meals. Just when he thought the whispers had died down, they sparked back up. On several occasions he had walked to classes the past week and heard ‘death eater’ and ‘murderer’ murmured under the breaths of students. It no longer seemed as though he could keep keeping to himself. Students were growing more brazen and it was becoming harder not to react.

When he got to Harry’s room, he knocked gently on the door and the door flew open.

Harry was laying in his bed in a similar state as when he arrived at Draco’s dorm the previous weekend – pajama bottoms and shirtless.

“Um…I brought you food.” Draco moved to set down the plate on the desk near the bed.

“Thanks…sorry, I know this is annoying and awkward. It’s just every time I go out there, they’re everywhere!” Draco knew he was referring to the girls.

“Ron brought me food on Monday, but he kept bringing up Ginny and his _family_ and asking – what does this mean for _us?_ Then I switched to Hermione yesterday, but she kept wanting to _talk_ about the break-up and it was getting to be exhausting. You don’t ever have to do this again if you don’t want to.”

“I – I don’t mind. I get it…don’t want to be mauled by your adoring fans. Probably for the best anyway, I think I saw one of the boxes leaking something that smelled an awful lot like a love potion.”

Harry groaned and threw himself on his bed. “See! This is what I’m talking about!”

“Potter…relax. There are worse things than having a school full of girls chase after you.” Draco tried to offer a helpful smile.

“Yeah – like what?” Harry was being defiant.

“Like…defeating a dark wizard? Or better yet…having to _live_ with a dark wizard.” Draco didn’t mean for this conversation to take such a dark turn, but here we are.

“Yeah, but at least Voldemort wasn’t trying to shag either one of us.” There was silence, but soon Draco couldn’t keep in the laugh – it came tumbling out of him.

“I don’t know. I just thought…I just _want_ people to be over it. The only reason all of these girls want me is because they think I’m some sort of hero. I don’t want that. I want someone who wants me _despite_ that.”

“You are a hero, Harry. And trust me, that’s not the only reason they want you.” Draco felt his face flush. He needed to stop himself. The conversation was venturing into dangerous territory.

Draco met Harry’s eyes before Harry quickly looked away.

“At the risk of losing the _immense privilege_ of bringing the Savior his daily meals, may I ask why you and the girl Weasley broke-up?”

“It just…wasn’t working. It used to work. It used to work really well actually.” Harry got a goofy smile on his face and Draco grew irritated.

“Okay Potter. I don’t want details of your sex life, I’m looking for a reason for the break-up…unless they’re related…?”

Harry turned red before responding, “No, they aren’t related. I don’t think… we actually didn’t engage in a lot of…sex. Mostly snogging. But even that didn’t feel like it used to. As shit as is it is to say, I think Ginny wants me more than I want her.”

Draco came to sit next to Harry on the bed. “It isn’t shit if it’s true.”

“Yeah, well, be that as it may – it certainly felt like shit when I told her that.”

“You _told_ her that? Just like that? To her face?”

“What was I supposed to say? I had been trying to drop hints! She wasn’t taking them. She just kept talking and acting like we were going to be together forever. But my heart wasn’t in it anymore…” Harry grew quiet, “we should have never gotten back together…the war changed people.”

Draco felt like that was an understatement. “Wars will do that Potter.”

“Shit Draco…I’m sorry. Of course, you already know that – it was stupid of me to say. Especially sitting here whining about _girl_ problems.”

“Don’t be sorry – you’re right. But luckily for me, it changed me for the better…I think. The war taught me a lot about myself and my family.” On the last word Draco shivered. He had been trying very hard not to think about his father but felt this was where the conversation was heading.

“Yeah, you seem…better.” Harry looked as if he didn’t want to bring up Draco’s father either.

“Look, Potter – let’s just get it out there. Thank you for speaking on behalf of my mother and me. You certainly didn’t have to, and yet you did it anyway – because you’re… _you._ But…thank you.” Draco felt almost as uncomfortable saying it as Harry looked receiving it.

“And…I’m sorry about your father, Draco. Well, I’m not _really sorry_ , but I’m sorry for you…”

“Trust me Potter. On that one, you have nothing to be sorry for. The man deserved what he got. And without him – I am much better off. My father had some very fucked up views on things.”

“Yeah, I can’t even imagine what it must have been like to grow up with someone like him…or maybe I can. My aunt and uncle were terrible…” Harry lightly shook his head before looking down at the ground.

“My father had a lot of expectations for me. They started when I was very young, and they impacted the way I interacted with people. I allowed his prejudices to infiltrate my own mind and his views became mine. As I got older, he became clear about what he wanted from me – get married. Carry on the Malfoy name.” Draco scoffed, “some name to carry on…” Draco couldn’t believe he was talking like this in front of Harry Potter.

“And that’s not what you want…?”

“I’m gay, Potter.” _Holy shit what did he just do?_ Draco felt his confidence falter but refused to let it show. “And while I may want to get married and have kids someday, it certainly won’t be with a witch and it certainly won’t be because of some fucked up pureblood tradition.”

The longer Harry didn’t speak the more Draco became nervous. Maybe Harry _was_ homophobic…

“Merlin Potter! Don’t tell me you _actually_ have a problem with gay people…”

“What?! No! I- I don’t. I’m happy for Dean and Seamus, and Ron’s brother Charlie is gay…and he’s…great” Draco noticed the breathiness in Harry’s words as he said ‘great’.

“Then what is it?”

“I-I don’t know…” Harry grew quiet and looked off towards the wall. “It’s nothing. Have you…have you told anyone else?”

Draco noticed the quick change in Harry’s tone, but decided not to comment on it, “My father knows... but I’m not exactly the most popular man in Hogwarts, so no – I haven’t broadcast my sexuality for everyone.”

“You father knew? How…?”

_Oh, you see, when I was 15 years old, I couldn’t stop wanking off to the idea of you on top of me. He found me one day and used truth serum to get me to divulge my thoughts to him._

“It’s not important. Eat up Potter. Get some rest – I’ll see you tomorrow.” Draco left without hearing Harry’s response.

Draco closed the door to his room and slid down the wall. _Why did I do that? Why did I say those things? So what if Potter is single? So what if he made a face when he mentioned Ron’s brother’s name? These things mean nothing…_

Sure Draco. Keep telling yourself that.


	4. Some Things Never Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry's still in his room and refusing to leave, Draco is looking for alone time, and a letter from a certain someone contains concerning information...

Harry stayed in his room the following two weeks. Even after some of the madness had died down, he remained. He left for classes but continued to receive his food in his room – he never asked for Draco again, so Draco figured Harry just had a house elf bring it. Merlin knows the house elves would be more than happy to bring THE Harry Potter his meals.

Draco was beginning to suspect Harry liked it in his room. Away from prying eyes and whispers.

Harry still managed to arrive to classes, but no one ever saw him getting _to_ the classes. It was if he just ‘magically appeared’. Draco knew that wasn’t the case and suspected a certain invisibility cloak was helping.

Draco and Harry hadn’t spoken much since the night he brought him dinner. Draco wasn’t sure who was avoiding who at this point but did know he wasn’t going out of his way to interact with Potter either. Their last conversation had hit too close to home for Draco. So, Draco decided to go back to keeping his head down.

This was working until he saw a flash of shimmering light in the hallway on a walk late one evening. He had taken to these walks his first week back as a way to ‘de-stress’ and process his thoughts. But he never saw a shimmer like this…

“Harry…” The shimmer moved.

“How in the hell do you always know it’s me?” a voice erupted from the shimmer.

“It’s a talent of mine – I always know where you are.” _Shit Draco that was creepy…_

Draco didn’t have too long to wallow in his awkwardness before the two heard the sound of giggling girls coming around the corner. In a flash, Draco was being pulled in an alcove by a floating hand wrapped around his tie. Harry threw the cloak over the two of them and instructed Draco to stay quiet by placing his finger over his lips.

As the two girls passed by, Draco noticed how close the two men were. Under the cloak, Draco could feel Harry’s hot breath and was dangerously close to his face. The alcove was small and forced the two to stand flush against one another. Draco tried to think about mandrakes as a way to ensure his body would not place him into a compromising situation being this close to the man.

Once the girls were gone, Harry didn’t move. He had been looking to his right and monitoring the girls as they moved past, but now was moving his head to face Draco.

“The mean, scary girls are gone Potter. And as cozy as this, it’s probably safe for us to move.”

Harry looked around nervously as he began to take off the cloak and maneuver back into the hallway.

“Right, sorry. It’s gotten better…I just like to… be sure, you know?”

“Sure Potter…”

“And I’m sorry that we haven’t talked…lately. It’s not because of what you told me or anything.” Harry was growing more and more nervous by the minute.

“I didn’t think it was Potter.” _Yes I did._

“I’ve just been busy…thinking and school and stuff.” 

“I get it, Potter. It’s fine.” And on that, Draco took it as his cue to leave.

The day after the alcove, Harry returned for meals. The Great Hall went silent as he entered but didn’t stand long – people got over it rather quickly.

But while Harry’s attention waivered, it seemed as though Draco’s increased. Gone were the days of drifting anonymously around the castle. Well, let’s face it, he was never anonymous – just invisible. And he had liked it that way. But now all eyes seemed to be on him and stay there. Every day he sat at the table the stares increased. The whispers were becoming louder and more vocal. He continued to keep his head down but grew more and more agitated by the day.

Two weeks of this and Draco was growing exhausted. So, when a majority of the eighth years decided to journey to Hogsmeade this Saturday, he took this as a quick opportunity to pass and have the day to himself. He would have his Saturday morning routine with no interruptions. He would get to wander around the eighth-year dorms as he pleased and spend a day in silence.

Saturday morning came and Draco began. He woke up lazily and began to journey down his stomach and into his pants. He conjured up images of a half-naked man down the hall, coming into his room. But right as the images became clear and the man began to climb into his bed and explore his body – there was a knock at the door.

It took Draco a moment to register the sound and escape his dream world. “You’ve got to be kidding me”, he muttered to himself as he pulled his hand from his pants and began to rise out of the bed towards his robe.

He flew open the door in haste and let out an aggressive, “what?!”

The man stared back at him. “Oh, um, sorry…am I bothering you?” Harry moved his eyes down before quickly bringing them back up to meet Draco’s eyes.

Draco quickly noticed that while he put his robe on, he didn’t actually close it. He quickly moved to fasten his robe before responding. “I was just… about to shower. What is it you need Potter?”

“Well, everyone is going to Hogsmeade today”

“Yes I’m aware. So shouldn’t you be getting ready?”

“Oh, I’m not going to go. Just too much right now with…everything.”

“Okay…”

“So, I wanted to see if you were also not going and we could do something…together.”

“Oh, no, I’m not going. What did you have in mind?” Harry gave a grin and before he knew it, Draco was abandoning his routine yet again for Potter. He quickly dressed and made his way out of the dormitory to meet Harry at the Quidditch pitch.

The two flew for hours. They alternated between playing an actual Seekers game and just…flying.

During a rather intense game of seekers, Harry and Draco spotted the snitch at the same time and dove for it. As the ground became closer and closer, it felt like old times – neither pulling up, neither giving in, and both going head-first into the ground. Finally, Harry reached out a hand to grab the snitch – with Draco right on his tail. As Harry grasped the snitch, he took a fall and dragged Draco down with him, both hitting the ground hard and rolling.

The game ended with Harry holding the snitch and with Draco and him on the ground - Draco on top of him. It took Draco a moment to understand their position as he raised himself up. He found himself staring down at Harry, his hands straddling the side of the man’s head and their bodies lying flush.

Neither spoke in this moment. They stared at each other for longer than was necessary and Draco brought his mind back to Sprout and the sound of mandrakes to keep his body in check.

“Never could let me win, could you Potter?” Draco found his voice and needed to break the tension.

“Yeah, well – some things don’t change.” Harry responded, but didn’t look as if he was trying to move.

Draco pushed himself off the ground and found his way to his feet before extending his hand for Harry and hoisting him up.

The tension must have been too much for Harry too because he quickly said, “Think it’s time to head back. People will likely be getting back from Hogsmeade soon.” And without waiting for Draco’s reply, started moving back towards the castle.

Draco hated to be leaving the pitch. He was beginning to love spending time with Harry, especially when it was just the two of them. It didn’t happen often, and Draco couldn’t help but notice that after every one of their interactions – Harry would suddenly disappear for long periods of time. But he pushed that thought out of his mind.

It was in these moments. Right now. Just the two of them – he felt…good. It was also in these moments that his mind didn’t wander to his father or his family or…any of it. He made sure to just be present. With Harry.

Draco was growing frustrated by his attraction to Harry. This was the man he had dreamt about for the past four years. The man who saved the wizarding world and is now befriending a death eater. The man who spoke on his behalf and is the reason he is free. He spent so long thinking this man would never be interested in him, and honestly – he probably isn’t, but now they’re…friends? 

After his flying with Harry, Draco returned to his room with growing agitation. _What would have happened if I kissed him? He didn’t move from under me. He didn’t seem in any hurry to get out from under me…_

Draco threw himself on the bed and was continuing his internal conflict when he heard a tap at the window. He rose up and noticed an owl with a letter. He didn’t recognize the owl, but he recognized the writing on the outside…his father.

This was the first time his father attempted to contact him since their last meeting. Draco opened the letter and began to read –

_Draco,_

_I hear from my sources that you have returned to school and are making new friends. And that one of these friends is none other than our friend Mr. Potter._

_I surely hope this is in an attempt to get your dear father out of prison. Your words from your last visit cut me deeply, but I know you Draco. I know you value your family and that is why you worked so hard to be like me. We want the same things Draco. We always have. And while I know, as you grew older, we did not see eye-to-eye, I do believe you are capable of greatness. I saw it in you when you became like me and took the mark._

_And while I know our side did not win the battle, we will continue the war. But in order for us to succeed, I must be out of this prison. So, I will urge you, once again, to talk to Potter. Use your new friendship to fight for your father or I fear what may come of your insubordination._

Draco cast an incendio the minute he finished reading the letter in hopes of erasing it forever. How could his father think he wanted to be like _him?_ Sure, when he was a child, he thought he would. His father was his hero. But years of trauma made that no longer a reality.

But as much as Draco wanted to forget the letter – one piece stuck out above the rest. And it’s the line that’s burned into his memory – _Use your new friendship to fight for your father or I fear what may come of your insubordination._

What could this mean? If his father had sources at Hogwarts, then who knows what he was capable of achieving from Azkaban.

These thoughts weighed heavy on his mind and they drove him to stay clear for Harry for the weeks leading up to the winter break.

He already decided he wouldn’t be returning to the Manor. The summer was bad enough and he knew his mother would understand. He was looking forward to spending the holiday alone.


	5. Happy Christmas, Draco

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco decides to stay back during the winter break as a way to find solitude and peace from the other members of his dorm while also processing the letter from his father.

Draco Malfoy loved Christmas. It was easily his favorite holiday of the year. Growing up at the Manor, Christmas was a very important time. The house was always decorated beautifully – several trees, all immaculately dressed to perfection with piles upon piles of gifts seated neatly underneath.

His favorite tree could be found in the library. It was smaller, but when you moved closer to it, you could see it move. The tree had charms placed upon it so it moved with a slight burst of wind – or even if you just blew on it, it would sway. It held snow on its branches that would melt off then re-form. It was a truly magical tree.

He loved Christmas dinner – all of his favorites would be made, and he would sit at the table with his mother and father. All happy.

But those days were obviously gone. His father was in Azkaban and his mother was…well, Draco honestly wasn’t sure what was happening with her. But she had changed.

The Manor was tainted. Draco couldn’t even imagine putting up a Christmas tree in that house now. What would there be to celebrate exactly? The people that had been tortured and held captive there? No, I think not.

So, when it came time for all of the eighth years to put their name on a list to leave or stay for the winter holidays, Draco quickly placed himself on the ‘stay’ list.

He checked the list several times in the week leading up to winter break and was happy each time to find he was the only one staying. He figured everyone wanted to be back home with their family after the war. But not him. He would be completely happy to stay in this dorm by himself all break.

Draco would use this opportunity to _not_ think about the letter his father sent him, although it was honestly the only thing he thought of all day as it was. He couldn’t shake the fact that Lucius had connections at Hogwarts and that they had seen Draco with Harry…

What if Draco wasn’t safe? What if Harry wasn’t safe…?

The day came and gone for people to leave. He stayed in his room that day for the most part, afraid it would make his depressed that he didn’t have a home to go home to for the holidays.

Draco woke up the next morning to a silent dorm. As soon as his eyes opened and his brain could register what was happening, a smile crept upon his face. He was alone. And could do whatever he wanted.

He decided to get up out of bed and go down to the fireplace in the common room. He was chilly and in this moment all he could think about was laying in front of the fireplace, maybe reading a book and enjoying his peace and quiet.

He rolled out of bed in nothing but his pajama bottoms. He looked over at his robe but decided against it – he wanted the fire and didn’t want to get too hot to enjoy it. He put his slippers on and made his way down to the common room. He looked around at the emptiness and smiled. He had grabbed a book from his room before he left, but now all he wanted was to lay down. He started the fire and laid in front of it, eyes closed.

“Guess we’re the only ones here.” He heard a familiar voice and immediately popped his eyes open and sat up.

“Salazar Slytherin!” Harry Potter stood over him by the fire – also shirtless and in his pajama bottoms.

Harry let out a loud laugh, “Salazar Slytherin? Really? Tell me Draco, do _all_ Slytherins use their house name when they’re frightened? Because I can assure you no Gryffindor yells out _Godric Gryffindor!_ ”.

Draco gave a scowl that quickly turned into a smile before answering, “I thought I was alone. I didn’t see anyone else on the stay back list.”

Draco watched as Harry stopped laughing and begin to take in the sight in front of him. Draco quickly felt self-conscious and regretted not bringing his robe. He saw Harry’s eyes roam over his chest and eventually find his dark mark.

Draco moved his arms to his chest as a way to both hide the mark and his exposed chest. Harry moved to sit down next to him and both men moved in a way that their backs rested against the sofa and their feet towards the fire – side by side.

“Yeah well, I typically go to the Burrow for Christmas. But with everything that happened with Ginny…I don’t know. I just didn’t feel right…” Harry finished and looked down at his hands in his lap.

“Oh – Did she not want you there?”

“I don’t know…we haven’t talked since it happened. But Ron wanted me to go. He said the Weasleys are still my family, but I knew it would be awkward…so I stayed.” Harry kept his eyes on his hands before continuing, “What about you?”. On this Harry looked up to Draco.

“Oh – um, didn’t really want to go home. With…everything. Doesn’t feel like home anymore anyway…” What was it about sitting near Harry Potter that made Draco want to spill his guts to the man?

“Yeah, I can’t even imagine…” Harry once again trailed off and the two sat in silence.

“Do you…do you want to go grab breakfast?” Draco offered up to break the tension.

Harry smiled and answered ‘yes’. Both men went to their respective rooms, changed, and went down to a near-empty Great Hall. Draco thought the meal would be awkward. They had never eaten just the two of them together, but quickly found they had a lot to talk about it. They started with safe topics – school, homework, etc. Then ventured towards quidditch and back to school again.

As lame as the conversation topics were, Draco was enjoying himself. He had never talked to Harry like this. So, open and care-free. No insults, no jabs, and no animosity. Just conversation.

When they finished, they agreed to go out for a fly. They grabbed brooms and went out – flying and playing like they had done before.

They came back to the dorm and went into their respective dorms with a quick discussion on needing to do homework and take a shower.

Draco went into his room and did just that. Showered, then homework. He tried to busy himself with his work and kept trying to re-focus but found his thoughts drifting towards the letter more and more. He shook himself out of it and once again tried to work on his defense paper, but thinking about defense made him think about the boy down the hall…

He couldn’t take it anymore. He decided to stop even trying to do work and stood up from his desk to find it had grown dark outside. He decided to once again go and sit by the fire to warm up. As he looked at his robe again, he smirked. Harry had already seen him like this – pajama bottoms, no shirt. And he had looked at him…

Draco opened his door with no robe and began to venture down to the common room. Once there, he found the fire already going and Harry sitting in the same spot as earlier – back against the sofa, feet to the fire. Just sitting and staring into the fire.

Draco came and sat next to him in his same spot as earlier. “Hey…”.

Harry looked from the fire and smiled, “Hey.”

The two turned silent and again just stared at the fire. Draco went to open his mouth to speak, but found Harry was doing the same.

“You go…” Harry said. “No, you.” Draco smiled. He really didn’t have anything important to say so felt it best to let Harry go.

“How did you know you were gay?” Draco’s eyes widened. He wasn’t expecting that at all.

“Oh…” Harry grew anxious, Draco could tell by the way he was playing with his fingers in his lap.

“Never mind – forget I asked. It was rude. I shouldn’t have asked.”

“No, um…it’s fine. I just…knew? I don’t know. I started having thoughts and dreams…” Watch it Draco….

“Thoughts and dreams?” Harry echoed back.

“Um, yeah. You know like…dreams…” Draco was trying to be obvious and subtle at the same time.

Harry looked at him confused. Draco rolled his eyes and continued. “Sex dreams Potter. About blokes.” Wow, how did this guy defeat a dark lord?

Harry’s eyes widened and he turned red. Interesting.

“Oh – right…” Was all Harry responded with and the two went quiet again.

“Why do you ask?” Draco was strangely feeling confident in this conversation and it was fascinating to watch Harry uncomfortable.

“Oh – no reason. Just…asking.” Harry looked away again. “Ron’s brother Charlie is gay…did I mention that?”

Draco smiled, “Uh yeah – I think you did. Don’t tell me you’re trying to hook me up with a Weasley, Potter. I may have changed, but I have standards.” Draco knew this sounded rude but hoped Harry would catch the joke.

Harry smiled and Draco relaxed. “No, I’m not… I just…I had never met a gay person before Charlie. We grew close over the summer…he’s really cool, actually. And then Dean and Seamus came out…and I just didn’t know the wizarding world could be so…accepting…It’s definitely not like that in the muggle world.”

Draco tensed up at the thought of acceptance, “It’s definitely not accepted across all of the wizarding world. I imagine the Weasleys are okay with it because they have seven children, so if one is gay it’s no issue. There are six more to carry on the bloodline. And Dean isn’t pureblood so…” Draco was growing heated and hated himself for it. He was projecting way too much into this conversation. He didn’t even know the Weasleys or Dean’s family. It was wrong to make these assumptions.

“Oh – I didn’t even think about it like that…” Draco tried to calm himself down. Harry was ignorant, it wasn’t his fault.

“It’s fine Harry. You didn’t think about it because you don’t have to. You aren’t gay and you aren’t pureblood.” The two sat in silence again for another moment.

Draco could feel Harry’s anxiety growing next to him. The tension between the two was mounting and growing uncomfortable. He wanted to shake Harry and tell him, “Just say what you want to say!”. But as soon as he turned to face Harry and shake the man, Harry moved forward and kissed him.

Draco’s eyes went wide as he tried to acknowledge what was happening but when Harry didn’t back away Draco decided to go for it. Hell, if Harry wanted to kiss him, then he would definitely kiss him.

Draco pushed back against Harry and Harry kept kissing. Draco couldn’t help but think how _good_ Harry was at this. Harry began to move and adjust himself, all the while never breaking the kiss. Next thing Draco knew, Harry was in his lap – legs straddled over him. For someone who had just dated a girl, Harry sure did seem eager to be in this position with Draco…

Draco could feel himself in his pants and knew his pajama bottoms weren’t hiding anything at this point, but he could also feel Harry…

He couldn’t believe this was happening. Harry Potter was on top of him, making out with him, aroused because of him… Draco tried to take it a step further and pushed his hips up slightly to gain friction, but immediately found his lips abandoned.

When he opened his eyes, he found a wide-eyed Harry staring back at him. Draco didn’t want to speak and break whatever it was that was happening, so he just stared at Harry as Harry stared back.

Eventually, Harry began to push himself off and the two returned to their spots from earlier. Draco was in a state of confusion and watched as Harry simply sat there and looked at the fire.

That was all real, right? Like, he hadn’t dreamt this, right?

“I…” Harry started, but stopped himself. Draco looked at him, but Harry wasn’t meeting his eyes.

“Harry…it’s okay…” Draco really didn’t know what to say but felt he should say at least that much. He didn’t want Harry to feel bad about what happened.

Harry didn’t respond. Draco continued, “It doesn’t have to mean anything…” Draco was starting to feel panicked for some reason. The more Harry didn’t respond, the more nervous Draco grew. It wasn’t wrong what had happened…

Draco had spent too many years feeling shameful for his feelings, he wasn’t going to let Harry feel the same.

Harry stood up to leave. Draco didn’t move. Harry gave Draco once last glance then took off up the staircase and Draco heard his door shut.

It took Draco a moment to focus, but when he eventually snapped back to reality, he too made his way towards his dorm. He entered, closed the door, and threw himself on his bed. He was beating himself up about what had happened.

He kissed me. He moved on top of me. He continued to kiss me. And like, really kiss me. I could…feel him. That was real… So what in the bloody hell happened?

Draco exhaled and heard a tap at the window. His eyes widened and his body froze. Without getting off the bed or sitting up he turned his head towards the window and saw a familiar owl with a letter…

He stood up in a trance and walked over to the window and grabbed the letter. He opened it and found familiar handwriting –

_Draco,_

_I’ll take your silence as an agreement._

_You have until March 1 st. I expect to hear status updates on the progress you’re making with Harry Potter. _

_There is still so much I need to do, and I can’t do it from in here Draco. I must be let out and Harry Potter is the one to do it._

_Your Father_

Draco screamed and cast a too powerful incendio over the letter before calming down and stopping the fire. He threw himself back on the bed and buried his face in his pillow. So much for his peaceful time alone this holiday break.

Happy Christmas, Draco.


	6. Charlie: The Mentor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco hasn't seen Harry since the kiss and has spent the remainder of his holiday wallowing in self-pity.

March 1st. The date stayed in his brain for the remainder of his holiday at Hogwarts. Two months…then what? What would happen on March 1st if he _didn’t_ get Harry to help his father? What was his father capable of doing from inside Azkaban?

Draco didn’t want to think about this too much. He had no intention of ever helping his father, so there was no point. He would just need to figure something else out. Something that didn’t involve helping his father nor Harry or him getting killed.

As much as this weighed on his mind, he couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss. It was…perfect. It was everything he ever thought kissing Harry Potter would be and more. As much as he wanted to block it out and pretend it didn’t happen (because honestly that would be easier than acknowledging it did indeed happen and that Harry had run off after), he couldn’t. He replayed it every night before he went to sleep for the rest of break. He knew it was dangerous. He needed to block it out – make it go away. There was no use focusing on it.

Harry hadn’t spoken to him. Not once. Actually, he hadn’t even _seen_ Harry. Everyone would be returning tomorrow, and Harry had been no where to be found. Draco just assumed he had gone back to taking his meals in his room and was actively avoiding Draco at all costs. Draco warred with himself about going and knocking on the man’s door but fought against it.

The letters, thinking about his father, and being rejected by Harry had put Draco in a terrible mood for the rest of his break. He had once been so looking forward to his time alone, but now, all he wanted was someone to talk to. Someone to confide in.

He spent the break wallowing in his room. He tried to do his schoolwork. The professors had assigned an enormous amount of work over the break and Draco was trying really hard to be a good student. He needed to do well, get a good job, and get out of the public eye. That was the plan. Forget his father, forget Harry Potter. Focus on school. Focus on your future. Focus on your life.

The night before students were set to return, Draco sat at his desk and repeated this mantra to himself. _Focus on your future. Focus on your future._ He would repeat it until he could find the focus inside of himself to open his books and study. Books open, parchment scattered about, he heard a knock at his door. Draco looked up in alarm. What if this was his father?

Draco, that’s stupid. He’s in Azkaban. Open the door.

Draco stood and hesitantly opened the door. It definitely wasn’t his father. Instead, it was Harry Potter. A rather flushed and breathless Harry Potter, but a Harry Potter, nonetheless.

“Potter…?” Harry took this as an invitation and made his way inside the room in a rush.

Draco looked around in disbelief and confusion, waiting for the man to speak.

“I’m- I’m sorry for barging in like this.” Harry took a deep breath and motioned towards the bed, silently asking if he could sit. Draco nodded and sat opposite him in his desk chair.

“I thought you left…” Draco kept watching the man in front of him.

“I did. I went to the Burrow.” Draco nodded, “I see.” _So, he ran away. To get away from me. Great._

“I…wasn’t running away from you or anything.” Harry said almost as if he could read Draco’s thoughts. “Well, I guess I kind of was…the kiss…it just…took me by surprise.”

Draco felt this was the time to speak, “Um, you kissed me…”

Harry smiled, “No, I know. I meant that I surprised myself. I didn’t know I was going to do it until I did it. I’m like that sometimes…I can be a bit…impulsive, I guess.” Harry looked down at his lap.

“So you left because you surprised yourself?”

“No, I left because I didn’t know what to do after my impulse. In the moment, it felt like the right thing to do. But after…” Harry trailed off and part of Draco’s heart sank. Harry had regrets.

“You regretted it? After? That’s why you left?”

“No!” Harry raised his voice, but quickly corrected himself, “Well…I guess yeah. But not like you’re thinking. I didn’t regret the kiss…or I did? I don’t…I don’t know.” Draco was growing confused and frustrated. He had already spent the rest of his holiday depressed and trying to move past this kiss, and now here Harry was saying he regretted it but didn’t regret it. It was too much.

“Look. It’s fine. It was what it was – an impulse kiss apparently. Like I told you after it happened, it doesn’t have to mean anything, Harry.” Draco quickly acknowledged the use of Harry’s first name and hated himself.

“Harry?” Harry smiled at him and Draco decided to just let it go.

“This is coming out all wrong” Harry continued. “I’m sorry I left. Like I said, I can be quite impulsive sometimes and I just didn’t know how to deal with what had happened. So, I went to the Burrow. I went and talked to…Charlie actually.”

“You went and told the Weasleys that we kissed?”

“No! I just…I just told Charlie that I kissed a boy at school. I didn’t tell him who it was or anything, but strangely enough he figured out it was you. I’m not sure how, but I didn’t question it. He told me the same thing you’re telling me. That it doesn’t have to mean anything. And that maybe I’m just…experimenting? I think that’s the word he said.”

Great. Draco Malfoy gets to help Harry Potter experiment. This is _exactly_ what Draco always hoped for…

“I’m not saying I am experimenting! I’m just saying that’s what he said!” Draco couldn’t take this anymore.

“Potter. Say what you’re trying to say.” Draco could hear the frustration in his voice and didn’t care. Either Harry needed to say what he needed to say, or he needed to leave.

“Right. Sorry.” Harry cleared his throat before continuing. “I told Charlie. He told me that I could be experimenting, but then we kept talking. I told him about a lot of…things I guess. Feelings I had been having. Feelings I’ve had…before.” Harry looked down at his lap again. Draco felt they might be getting somewhere and decided to stay quiet.

“He said I could possibly be…bisexual. Or something.” On that Harry looked up at Draco who was definitely already staring at him.

“Okay…so you think you’re bisexual? Potter, one kiss doesn’t make you bisexual. Kissing another guy doesn’t make you bisexual. It’s about how you _feel_ about it. You aren’t bisexual just because you did it.” Draco felt the need to make this point clear.

“No, I get that now. Charlie said that too. But…I did feel something…about it. I’ve been feeling something for a while. Um, I’ve actually felt stuff in the past too. Like you mentioned that night by the fire…”

“Harry. I’m all for having this conversation with you if it helps. But I really need you to be more direct. I don’t want to play this game of reading between the lines and reading wrong.”

“Right. Sorry. I’ve just never really talked like this to anyone. Oddly enough, Charlie said the same thing. He said if I couldn’t say the words, then I’m not ready to have the conversation.” Draco nodded and hoped Harry would continue. “I’ve had dreams about guys before. Sex…dreams. Like you said. And…I’ve found guys attractive before…I just didn’t really realize that’s what it was at the time, I guess. But I’ve never wanted to kiss one until…well, until you.”

Draco felt his heart skip a beat. Harry did want to kiss him.

“I – I think I am bisexual. And…I think…I like you.” If Draco’s heart skipped before, it came to a full stop now. Draco didn’t realize he never responded until Harry kept talking, “Draco?”

Draco looked at him but couldn’t find words to respond.

“Look. I know this probably is stupid. Like, we just became sort of friends and we have a really long and terrible history. But if you think about it, nothing truly bad has happened between us in a really long time so maybe that means we are friends. And we don’t have to be anything more if you don’t want to. This is all happening pretty fast for me actually and I just don’t really know how to process it all so I’m trying to acknowledge my feelings and be honest about them because that’s what Charlie said to do….” Harry was rambling and Draco wasn’t really hearing any of it.

_I am bisexual. And I think I like you._

Draco had to think things over pretty quickly. Sure, this was everything he ever wanted. He just never actually thought he could have it. He had obviously been thinking about this way longer than Harry had and unlike Harry, he didn’t just realize his sexuality…he needed to be sensitive.

“Harry. I…I like you too. And I’m proud of you for facing your sexuality. Trust me, it isn’t always easy to do.” Draco smiled and watched Harry return it. “But…this is all pretty new to you. Are you…are you sure?”

“Am I sure about what? That I’m bisexual? I mean, pretty sure. About liking you? I’m pretty sure about that too. I feel…different about you than I ever have with anyone. Even Ginny…you and I feel…right?”

 _You and I feel right._ Draco couldn’t agree more. He’s felt that they felt right for a long time…

Draco got up from his chair and moved towards Harry. Harry stayed sitting on the bed and looked up as Draco came closer. Draco put his hands behind Harry’s head, resting on the back of his neck. He motioned for Harry to move back a bit, then straddled him. Still looking down, he moved in to kiss him. Draco pushed further and made the kiss more heated, pushing his tongue to open Harry’s mouth and going in when Harry opened.

He was enjoying this position a little too much when he was all of a sudden no longer in Harry’s lap and was instead being moved in the air. Harry grabbed him around his waist and quickly flipped them, so Harry was on top of him in the bed, Draco on his back.

 _Holy fucking shit._ Was all Draco could think in this position.

Harry continued the kiss and straddled Draco – their chests touching. Draco pushed his hips up once again to gain friction and once again felt his lips abandoned.

Harry moved off of him towards the edge of the bed. Draco moved to sit next to him.

“You…you okay?” He finally took a good look at the man. Cheeks flushed, hair even more a mess than usual, and shirt wrinkled beyond repair.

Harry let out a breathy, “Um, yeah.” Before smiling and looking back at Draco, “Yeah – definitely bisexual. And I definitely like you.” Draco smiled back.

“Harry…” Draco wasn’t a fool though. As much as he had always wanted and thought about this, that meant he also thought about consequences. “What exactly do you want…?”

“I want to date you!” Harry looked at Draco like this should be obvious. “That’s what people do when they like each other. Like Dean and Seamus.”

What a Harry Potter thing to say. Draco loved the way Harry was smiling, but also felt Harry wasn’t thinking this through. “Harry…do you understand what that would mean? Us dating? You’d be coming out…people would stare. They’d likely say things…probably not great things. I mean, I’m a death eater Harry. I’m probably the least popular person in this school right now. Not to mention the Prophet! They’d have a field day!”

“Draco. Do you know how much I’m talked about already? By students, professors, random people I don’t know? And don’t even get me started on the Prophet…they’d talk about me even if I didn’t do anything at all. I’ve actually already thought about all of this. I may be impulsive, but I’ve been gone for a couple of weeks now – I’ve had time.” Harry smiled and Draco couldn’t help but return it.

“I want to date you. Publicly. I just…I need to talk to Ron and Hermione first. Tell them properly. Then we can be out.” Harry’s eyes went wide. “Unless of course that’s not what you want! Then we don’t have to! This is probably too fast and everything.” Draco couldn’t help another smile from creeping on his face.

“No. It’s what I want. If you’re sure, I’m sure.” Harry moved in to kiss Draco again and it soon turned heated once again. Harry pulled away and looked at Draco.

“At the risk of taking this too fast, you should probably go back to your room. This is a lot for one night.” Harry seemed saddened but understood.

He made his way towards the door and turned back, “I’m going to tell Hermione and Ron tomorrow when they get back. We can talk tomorrow night about how it goes.”

“Goodnight, Harry.” Harry smiled, “’Night Draco.”

Draco laid back on his bed and closed his eyes. So many thoughts flooded into his brain at the same time. _This is fucking amazing. That kiss…that make-out was…unbelievable. Even better than the first. And Harry likes me…He wants to date me…publicly. Shit._

But just as that thought crossed his mind so did another… _March 1 st. _

His father…


	7. It Feels...Natural

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry tells Hermione and Ron about Draco...let's see how it goes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! This one is some-what short, but don't worry - more to come! Also, for anyone thinking the two boys (mainly Harry, let's be honest) are moving too fast, don't worry...you're not alone!

As Draco laid in bed that night, several thoughts hit him all at once.

First, he tried to remember the first time he remembers being attracted to Harry Potter. His fourteen-year-old self would say it was in fourth year during the TriWizard Tournament. But, his current self, would argue it was sooner. Likely third year. And probably around the time he was teasing him about the dementors in a veiled attempt to garner his attention.

He also remembered being fifteen years old and laying in his bed at the Manor and thinking about Harry Potter. He remembers those being some of his best memories… He, of course, remembers the sexual fantasies that started, but almost as if blocked from his memory and only now coming back, he actually remembers a faint feeling of hope. Hope or longing… Longing that maybe one day this boy, Harry, would feel the same way Draco did… _does._

He is naturally replaying the kiss that happened earlier tonight. He laughs to himself thinking about his fifteen-year-old self and what _that_ Draco might have to say about this turn of events. But then again, _that_ Draco probably wouldn’t understand what this meant. _That_ Draco hadn’t yet been betrayed by his cowardly father and forced to be something he never wanted to be.

And of course, he’s thinking of his father. It pains Draco to think of this man sometimes. There were good memories at some point, he knows there were…but in this moment, he’s struggling to remember them. He can only remember the cold eyes staring at him through the door way, the way his father said ‘We will kill Harry Potter’, and the way his father clung to the bars of his cell in Azkaban pleading for Draco to talk to Harry for him.

He wishes he hadn’t burned the letters from his father, merely so he could burn them now.

It figures that just as he has something he’s always wanted, his father is still here to take it from him.

Draco had no idea what he was going to do about his father and the deadline. He had no idea what the deadline meant or what would happen if he missed it. But he did know one thing.

He would never ask Harry to do anything for his father.

Draco couldn’t be sure what time he went to bed last night nor what time it was now. The only thing he could be sure of was that he heard the sound of several voices coming in through the common room. Figuring people must be coming back from their holiday, Draco brought himself out of bed and decided to get dressed and greet everyone.

Getting out of bed caused Draco to feel equal parts excited and fearful. He thought back to Harry from last night and remembered…Harry wanted him. Like, actually wanted him. But he also remembered that Harry planned on telling people. Namely Hermione and Ron… What would happen if they didn’t approve? Harry seemed pretty sure on Draco last night, but what if talking with his best friends causes him to see how terrible of an idea this is. And it is terrible…right?

By the time Draco made his way into the common room most of the eighth years had already gone into their respective rooms and were unpacking. He decided to make his way to the Great Hall for breakfast before everyone got down there.

Just as he started for the door out of the dorm, he felt a hand on his forearm. He spun around and saw an overly excited Harry Potter staring at him.

“Morning!” Harry exclaimed in a way that was either fake or nervous. Given who he was talking to today and what he was going to say, Draco figured nervous.

“Good morning to you too” Draco smiled because he honestly couldn’t help it.

“Ready for today?” The excitement stayed in Harry’s voice as he spoke.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

“Right…well, I am actually. Nervous…but excited.” Harry smiled and it took everything Draco had not to take this man and kiss him senseless right then and there. But that would have to wait. He didn’t know how Harry would react to such a public act. Actually, Draco didn’t know how _he_ would act to such a public act.

“What do you think they’ll say?” Draco tried to hide the concern in his voice but could tell it was seeping out.

“Honestly? I have no idea. I think Hermione will be fine. I mean, she knows you’re different this year. Hell, she’s the one that started inviting you around. But Ron…Ron can be…” Harry trailed off at the end and began to fidget with his fingers. Draco was quickly noticing this was a nervous habit of his.

“Thick-headed? Ignorant? Close-minded?” Draco was honestly just trying to be helpful, but the glare Harry shot back told him he wasn’t.

“More or less… but I was actually going to say protective. I know he cares a lot about me, and I know he’s pretty much over me and Ginny. And I mean, he’s cool with Charlie being gay…so I don’t think that parts going to be the problem.” Harry’s eyes grew wide as he realized what he said.

“It’s going to be me, right? I’m going to be the problem?” Draco knew it was true, so he didn’t know why his voice sounded so hurt by it.

“Yes, but I don’t mean it like that. I just mean…” Harry exhaled and attempted to gather his thoughts, “I just mean I think my sexuality will be fine with him. But it’s likely going to take him a while to warm to the fact that I want to date…you.” Draco hated how the last sentence made him smile. Harry Potter wants to date him.

But just as he smiled, he could feel his face drop. He and Harry needed to talk. Amidst all of his thoughts last night, and after thinking about his father and the letter, it became increasingly clear that it wasn’t safe for him and Harry to be public yet. He needed to get the mess with his father sorted out first, make sure Harry wasn’t in any danger, and then they could be whatever Harry wanted them to be. But having that conversation, without telling Harry about the letter, was going to be difficult.

“What…what’s wrong? You don’t want me to tell them?” Harry’s eyebrows furrowed into a sign of worry and Draco took his arm and led him to the sofa. They were alone in the common room, so he figured this was his best chance.

“No – it’s not that. I just…” Draco let out an exhale, it was his turn to gather his thoughts and Harry seemed to realize this and stayed quiet, “I just was thinking a lot last night. And I don’t think we should take this public.” He saw the way Harry’s face dropped almost as if he deflated.

“You don’t want to go public…?”

“Yet! I just…this is so new and so fresh. I think that if we take it public too quickly, it could really backfire on us.” Draco hated that he wasn’t telling Harry the whole truth, but he knew he couldn’t. Not right now. Knowing Harry, and let’s face it, Draco _knew_ Harry, he would likely go off and do something stupid. He couldn’t risk it. “I just think that we should sit with this for a while. See what it is first before we go and out you and our relationship to the Prophet or worse…the Hogwarts student body.” Draco smiled in an attempt to get Harry to smile. He didn’t.

“I see…” Harry looked heart-broken and it took everything in Draco to not retract everything he just said.

“But you can still tell your friends! Tell anyone you think you can trust to not spread it.”

“Right…well…um, for now I suppose that’ll just be Hermione and Ron.” Draco hated the sound in his voice as he spoke. “I plan to tell them this afternoon. I can meet you in your room tonight, after?” Harry looked at Draco with hope and Draco smiled back and nodded. “Okay, well, I should go. Ron wants to tell me all about the shit-storm that apparently happened after I left.” Harry smiled at him as he made his way back towards the rooms.

The rest of Draco’s day seemed to drag as he kept waiting and anticipating what Harry’s friends would say. He played every scenario he possibly could in his head as a way to brace himself for whatever Harry came to him with this evening.

He had been bracing himself for it so much that when evening came and he heard a knock at the door, he jumped in fright. He opened the door and found a Harry Potter with absolutely no emotion on his face. Weird…

“So…how’d it go?” Draco followed Harry into the room as Harry took a spot on Draco’s bed.

“To be expected…I guess.” Draco couldn’t read Harry’s tone and was growing worried.

“That’s good, right? Granger was okay with it, Weasley not so much?”

“Not exactly…Hermione said she already ‘had a feeling’…whatever that means.” Draco smirked, that girl was too smart sometimes. “She just said we needed to be careful. She actually agrees with you about not going public yet.” Harry looked up at Draco and smirked.

It was in that moment that an idea crossed Draco’s mind. Possibly a foolish idea…but an idea nonetheless. He would circle back to it later.

“Well, that’s good…What about Weasley?” Harry gave him a look and Draco corrected himself to “Ron”.

“Ron was…less enthusiastic. It was strange really. He actually didn’t say much of anything. He just kind of sat there and nodded his head. When I told him I was bisexual, he hugged me…He said he was happy for me. But when I told him about you…that’s when he shifted.”

Draco knew this was the likely possibly. Actually, he honestly thought it would be much worse. He expected Ron to yell at Harry and coming charging at Draco with an unforgivable ready on his wand.

“Well, that’s kind of what you expected right?” Draco watched as Harry’s face when unreadable again.

“Yes. But…” Harry paused, “I just thought he would be different. Or rather I hoped. I mean, I wasn’t happy with Ginny and he knew that. And I’m sitting there _telling_ him that I actually want to be with you and he still couldn’t…deal with it.” Draco hated how much he understood Ron in this moment.

“Harry, I know you said you’re rather impulsive, but…I don’t think you’re really seeing this from an outside perspective. Look at us.” Draco motioned between the two of them and noticed how Harry gave a confused look. “We are who we are. We have a terrible history between us. We fought on two different sides of the war and honestly, people kind of hate me.”

“That’s not true!” Draco gave Harry a look that screamed a sarcastic ‘Really?’.

“It is what it is, Harry. But what I’m saying is, I understand Ron’s hesitation. This…” He motioned between the two of them again, “won’t be easy.” Draco knew that was an understatement.

“I know…but I don’t care what’s ‘easy’ because what you’re really saying is it won’t be ‘easy’ for other people. This is actually really easy for me…surprisingly. I mean, this feels…natural?” The way Harry looked at him in that moment could have melted Draco’s heart right then and there.

“I 100% agree. It does feel…natural.” Draco took this moment to move closer to Harry on the bed. He took the man in his arms and held him there for a moment until he felt the man stir.

Harry looked up at Draco and moved to kiss him. It started chaste, but quickly escalated as Harry began to push against Draco. Draco maneuvered himself to laying with his back on the bed and an excited, kissing Harry on top. As things continued, Draco knew this was a position that made Harry back off. He had noticed by now that any time Harry could _feel_ Draco beneath him, and Draco him, Harry would pull away.

And without fail, some heavy breathing and several minutes later, Harry pulled off to sit at the end of the bed. Draco moved up behind him.

“Harry…” Harry looked happy but worried at the same time, tucking his bottom lip in between his teeth.

“Sorry…I just…”

“It’s okay Harry.” Harry turned around to face him before continuing.

“I want to do more…” Draco blushed as Harry looked down at Draco’s stomach and let his eyes drift further. “I’ve just never really…done much. I mean, even with Ginny…” Draco smiled, and it seemed to ease Harry a bit.

“It’s okay. We can do as much or as little as you want.” Draco took Harry in his arms again and held him. He lowered the two of them back onto the bed and the two just laid there for what felt like ages. Eventually, Harry ‘The Voice of Reason’ decided it was probably best if he _didn’t_ stay in Draco’s room and went back to his own.

Tomorrow would begin the second term of the year and their actual final year at Hogwarts…


	8. Sudden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco knows exactly who he needs to talk to...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since I updated and this one is short...sorry! This story WILL continue - I'm just also working on other stories at the same time. 
> 
> Here you go! Kudos/comments always welcome!

Two weeks into the new term and Draco found himself in a now all too familiar location; studying at a table in the library with Hermione Granger. Draco was always fascinated by how often this tended to happen, with Harry usually slacking off on his studies and Ron following suit. But today their absence was welcome as he had something he needed to discuss with the witch.

“Hermione…” Draco whispered out into the library even though he really didn’t need to. They sat so far back that no one would even know they were there if it hadn’t been for their pile of books coming and going from the table.

“Hmm”, the witch responded without even glancing up from her parchment and Runes text.

Draco had decided weeks ago that of all of the people to talk with about the ‘father issue’, Hermione would be it. She had reacted well to Harry and Draco’s relationship, she was even the first to befriend him at the start of the year, and she was, even if it pained him to say it, the smartest in their year…possibly in the whole school.

She was a likely and obvious choice in confidant for this matter.

“I need…” Draco paused and looked around for a moment. This pause caused a shift in Hermione who sensed a problem in the air and threw her wand up to cast a silencing charm around them. Draco continued, “I need to talk to you about something rather important.”

Hermione fixed her expression into a determined look and responded, “I’m listening.” She closed her textbook as if to show that he had her full attention. “Is it about Harry?”

Draco blushed for a moment, “Yes and no. It’s about…my father.”

Draco watched as the witch moved in her chair uncomfortably while never letting her face show it. “Oh, I see. Yes, well I imagine he wouldn’t be too pleased about your relationship. But honestly Draco I don’t know much about pureblood customs – .”

Draco cut her off with a wave of his hand, “It’s not about _that._ Well, it is and it isn’t I guess…”

“Draco just spit it out. You’re not making much sense.”

Draco took a deep breath before explaining the situation with his father and the contents of the letter. He tried his best to leave out details he felt were…personal but wanted to make sure he gave her all the information she would need to help him make a decision or devise a plan.

After talking for what felt like forever, he stopped and looked at her. She paused as if to take in all of the information then asked a question Draco was hoping she would bypass, “Draco. Why did you father think you and Harry were in a relationship before…?”

Draco remained silent, processing what he could say to get out of this question. Fortunately, he was saved when Hermione, probably reading his silence as a refusal to answer, continued. “Well, this is…a lot to process. What does Harry think of it all?”

Draco continued to stare at her in silence.

“Draco! You haven’t told him! This directly concerns him!” She was trying to keep her voice level, but he could hear it beginning to rise.

“I know Hermione, I just…I don’t want to bother him with this. I don’t want him speaking on behalf of my father, not that he honestly would anyway, and I don’t want him trying to go off and fix this problem himself. You know, he does tend to do that…”

“Yes, well, even if that is true…”

“Which it is…” Draco watched as Hermione shot him a look.

“Even if it is true, he still needs to know Draco. Harry doesn’t like to be left out of things that concern him. He had too much of it with Dumbledore and the Order…”

Draco sat for a while and took-in everything she had to say. He knew she was right, but he also knew that telling Harry would surely cause panic and anger. Harry would want to know why he wasn’t told sooner and what he needed to do to help. He probably wouldn’t catch on to things the way Hermione did, so Draco felt his past secrets were probably safe.

“Draco…” Draco looked up from the spot on the table where he had been staring and nodded.

“I know Hermione. I’ll tell him.”

She gave a half smile before continuing, “Yes, I think that’s for the best. Then we can work as a team to figure this out, okay?” Draco returned the half smile and saw the witch was preparing to continue speaking. “But Draco… I do have to ask…”

Draco’s eyes widened in preparation for whatever was about to come.

“This thing with you and Harry…it seems sudden…doesn’t it?” Hermione seemed unsure if she truly wanted to ask this question, but Draco knew by now that if she wanted to know something, she was going to get her answer.

Draco contemplated all of the answers he could give before deciding on one that both hid the truth while also put the truth firmly out there, “For me, it isn’t soon at all.”

Silence fell over both of them and they returned to their work. Draco’s mind continued to think of how he was going to tell Harry and how the three of them could possibly fix this situation. Hermione, on the other hand, kept focused on her work while giving Draco looks of pity and curiosity for the remainder of their time together.

Telling Harry went as expected. He immediately jumped to his feet and grabbed his wand as if prepared to duel Lucius Malfoy right then and there.

It was only when Draco calmly took his arm and sat him back down that he saw Harry relax and truly process what this all meant.

“Harry…he wants you to get him out of prison. And if you don’t, then…I don’t know what, but something is going to happen.”

The look on Harry’s face was now unidentifiable. Draco could tell wheels were turning in Harry’s mind and he was likely running through various scenarios of how this could work in his head. Draco wanted to tell the man that this was useless and that he had already been doing this for the past several months, but he allowed the man to process.

The first question out of Harry’s mouth was a question that Draco too had been asking, “How did he know you and I were friendly?” Draco noticed the way Harry blushed on the word ‘friendly’ and it took everything he had not to smile and to remain focused on the conversation.

“I – I don’t know. But I wouldn’t put it past him to have someone at the school working for him. Some sort of informant, I imagine. But they must not be in the 8th year because he doesn’t know the _nature_ of our relationship.”

Harry seemed to be considering that point carefully. “Yes, but…he thought we were together at some point, right? When I helped you get out of prison in the first place? You and your mother, right?”

Draco grew uncomfortable and nervous at the prospect of having to tell Harry, ‘Actually, that’s because I’ve had a crush on you for many _many_ years and my father found out about it (along with _other_ things I had been doing) and therefore assumed we were together…’.

No. Best to not have _that_ conversation just yet…


	9. Harry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With little progress being made, Harry and Draco find time to...take a breathe.

The eighth year common room is dying down for the evening as even Hermione looks to be preparing herself for sleep. Ron stands to usher her towards her room and gives a small nod toward Harry and Draco, both sitting on the couch at a respectable distance from one another. 

“I think I’ll be going to bed as well.” Draco doesn’t turn to look at Harry but knows that he’s watching him get up and leave the room. Moments later and Harry is catching up behind him, following Draco towards his room. 

Draco opens the door to his room and turns to give Harry a cheeky smile. He watches Harry give one last look behind him at the deserted corridor before pushing Draco inside with a smirk. 

Slamming the door behind them with a wince, Harry shoves Draco up against the wall, lips pressing firmly against him. 

Draco’s hands immediately fly to Harry’s unkempt hair, his fingers finding their place amongst the dark locks, gripping and releasing. Harry usually stays out of his hair, a habit for which Draco is thankful, and instead tends to stay on his hips or lower back - never too much venturing elsewhere. 

This is as far as they’ve gotten in the past few weeks after winter hols and Draco is actually quite fine with it. When he’s here with Harry’s mouth, Harry’s firm frame pressed against his, and Harry’s hands grasped firmly on his waist, neither of them have to think about his father or what’s to come. 

They can simply exist in this space. A space that is theirs and no one else’s. 

Broken from his thoughts, Draco hears a moan echo in the room and is quickly startled to find it’s his. Harry’s right hand has left it’s marked spot on his hip and has ventured further south. Draco isn’t sure if the location is intentional and is terrified to move in any regard. 

Spurred by the moan, Harry places his hand more firmly on the bulge developing in Draco’s pants. This definitely feels intentional. 

“Is - is this okay?” Draco’s eyes flutter open to find Harry staring at him, nerves lacing his words. 

Draco has to clear his throat before he can even think to respond. “Merlin, yes. I mean - if you’re okay with it.” Harry stares at Draco for what feels like ages before moving again, this time his hand resting on the clasp of Draco’s uniform bottoms. 

Painfully slow, Harry unfastens the button and pulls the zipper lower, the sound of it and their heavy breathing the only thing filling the room. Harry places his hand down Draco’s trousers, over his underwear. Draco let’s out an all too loud gasp as Harry’s hand begins to move. 

Draco has to close his eyes to get away from Harry’s stare. He lets his head fall back on the wall with a soft thud as Harry’s grasp becomes more firm. 

He promptly feels Harry’s hand leave him and he knows this is it, the moment Harry pulls away. And that’s okay. This is much further than they’ve gone and if this is as far as Harry’s wanting to take it, then Draco is fine to wait. He’s waited this long for Harry, he’s happy to wait some more. 

But then he feels calloused fingers on his stomach, slowly moving lower and lower until they find the waistband of his underwear. They drift lower and Draco knows he will die right here and now. Harry goes lower and the most ridiculous thought crosses Draco’s mind, ‘Harry Potter is giving me a handjob’. 

The absurdity of it is almost enough to cause Draco to laugh, but he knows if he does that he will look mad and will likely scare Harry off from doing this ever again. So instead, he breathes and opens his eyes to reassure his mind that this is real. 

He’s not prepared for the sight he finds. Harry’s bottom lip is between his teeth and he’s staring down at Draco in complete concentration. It’s a mixture of incredibly endearing and undeniably hot. 

Afraid to break him out of his focus, but needing to give some reassurance, Draco speaks in what he thought was going to be a calm whisper but comes out much more heated, “Harry…”

Harry looks up with worry in his eyes, but Draco simply pulls him closer with a hand behind his head. The kiss seems to restore confidence in Harry as his grip becomes firmer and his motions more sure. Draco begins to find it hard to keep kissing and allows his jaw to slack as his own movements become sloppier. 

Harry moves towards his neck. An action Draco never knew he would like until he feels the scrape of teeth on his collarbone before a tongue is there to lick away the marks. He can feel all of Harry pressed up against him and knows Harry is just as turned on as he is, as evident by the man rutting against him.

“Fuck, Harry.” Harry has increased his speed and Draco knows he won’t last long at this rate. 

Harry moves towards his ear and whispers a soft, almost inaudible, “Draco.” That’s all it takes as Draco feels his whole body tighten and then release. He knows he’s covering Harry’s hand but neither of them seem to care as Harry continues stroking him through the climax. 

Harry’s movements slow and Draco feels his body give out, his head resting on Harry’s shoulder. They stay like this for several moments, Draco leaning his entire body upon Harry whose hand is still on Draco’s softening prick. 

This is it. This is his new favorite place in the world. 

“Was that...was that okay?” Harry leans back to face Draco head-on and removes his hand from Draco’s pants. 

“That was definitely more than ‘okay’. That was brilliant.” Draco moves his hands towards Harry’s bottoms, resting his fingers on his belt. “Allow me to return the favor?”

Harry breaks eye contact quickly, shifting away from Draco’s hands. “Um, that’s okay, actually.” Confusion, and slight hurt, settles on Draco as he eyes the man in front of him. Harry brings his clean hand to his neck and gives it a rub. “I already…” 

Draco’s eyes go wide at the thought. He fixes his expression quickly to not alarm Harry, instead opting to pull the man back towards him for another kiss. 

He can feel Harry pull away, his eyes piercing into him with a sense of determination. “No matter what Draco, it will be okay.” He tucks a piece of blonde hair behind Draco’s ear before caressing his face briefly. “I know this is all,” he stops and waves around the room as if to imply something. “But I do want you to know, I want this. I want it all. Eventually.” 

“All, Potter?” Feeling cheeky, he lets the seductive tone slip out and watches as the Chosen One blushes. “Well, I’m good with all of this,” Draco mimics Harry’s hand gesture, “for now.” 

Moments later Harry leaves with a faint, ‘goodnight, Draco’. As much he hates the idea of him leaving, he relishes the idea of time to relive everything that happened tonight. 

Laying on his back and staring at the ceiling, his mind is fixated on Harry. How often has he done this in his life? Laid on a bed, whether it be here at Hogwarts, or in his room at the Manor, and thought of Harry Potter. And while he may have thought of many scenarios involving the man, he never thought any of them could truly happen. 

A brief thought flutters into his mind and his mood sours immediately. 

His father knows about them. And while, before, his father had been wrong about him and Harry, now, everything his father thought is true. 

Draco had wanted to put his father, the letter, and the date far out of his mind. March seems so far off from now. He and Harry might not be anything when the date comes around. If that’s true, will Harry even want to help Draco figure it all out? 

Of course he will. He’s the Savior. 

He hates how little progress they’ve made on the whole thing. Although, ‘progress’ probably isn’t the best word seeing as how they have no idea what might happen on March 1st to even make a plan to make ‘progress’ on. 

That’s what kills Draco the most. He doesn’t know what any of this means and neither does Harry and Hermione. They’ve deduced that Lucius likely knows Harry and Draco are friends through someone who is currently in the castle. Since it is unlikely any of the current professors have allegiances to Lucius or former death eaters of any sort, especially with McGonagall’s strict hiring process this summer, it would have to be a student. 

The only way Lucius would have access to a student here at Hogwarts would be through another adult, likely their parent. That led Harry, Draco, and Hermione to developing a list of students whose parents could have connections to death eaters or Voldemort. 

This list ended up being rather short. Most of those students are gone, except for Draco of course. Students whose parents were connected to Voldemort, all in Slytherin and all people who Draco knew personally, didn’t return this year. 

It places them back at square one. No information. Nothing helpful. And while March feels far now, once classes pick up and things are moving, it will be here before any of them know it. 

As satisfied as he is in the moment, Draco fears it can’t and won’t last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m slowly but surely working on this piece! I am determined to see it through. As always, comments/kudos welcome!


End file.
